Our first house in Toronto was in North Toronto, on a very family oriented street.  My 2 year old had no friends in the neighbourhood–in those days your children’s friends depended on who your nanny chose to befriend quite frankly. (I hope that is changing by the way!)

When I discovered that we were surrounded by kids in the new neighbourhood, I was delighted.  I took my tiny little shy 2 year old’s hand in mine, and we knocked on the door of the people directly across the street from us.  I had come to see cars coming and going all the time–a mother rushing in with one child–a father dashing to work with bagel and coffee in hand, and a series of school buses at drop off and pick up.

For us, even watching all of this out the window was exciting!  We had to meet these people!

What I did not know or expect, was that the experience of knocking on that door would forever change all of our lives.  A family of remarkable people lived behind that front door, and my daughter was given the gift of life long friendship with 4 different children under one roof!

My neighbour, Shari, is a member of theperfectconnections editorial team (…see how you just never know in life!).  She has chosen to write a piece on one of her children for us today in hopes that it will illuminate and demonstrate just what this site was designed to do, bring us all a little closer.

Here is one of Shari’s most personal and heartfelt stories.  I am sure many readers can relate to her, find comfort and camaraderie in her, and if nothing else, learn something new here today.

I often wonder if anyone’s life turns out as they expected. I don’t think so. I’m convinced that every human being at some point in their life has an unforgettable moment that will remain etched in their minds forever.For me, that moment was when I found out my son Daniel had Down syndrome.

Everyone reacts differently. My husband fell asleep as if to escape the news. I could not sleep and for many months had the recurrent thought that I must raise a child with Downs. How would I do that? What do I know about disabilities? I felt so scared, helpless and alone.

Little did I know when I looked at this tiny baby how much pleasure, joy and normal stuff we would encounter together? Little did I know how great it would be for my other children to have a special sibling. And little did I know what a bonding experience having this child would be for us as a couple and for our family as a unit.   That can also be a worry.  So many families are so overly taxed by challenges that they find it hard to stick close together.

There is so much to say about Daniel. He is bright, extremely funny, kind and loving. He loves things that most twelve-year-old boys love. But the challenges are never far from the surface. Bad days happen often. Inappropriate behaviour creeps up and surprises us no matter how many times we discuss it with him. Making friends is difficult for him. Thankfully, he can study in our local public school in a special education class. This is a double-edged sword. We’re thrilled that he is smart enough to be there but scared that he has too much freedom and too little supervision. For example, on the second day of middle school, he became disoriented and lost his way back to school from the local McDonalds. He was missing for two hours. Police, teachers and friends were searching for him. It was very scary, and relief had new definition when he was found!

But good days happen as well. Daniel was the valedictorian

of his sixth grade class. There were two valedictory

speeches. One child from the regular stream spoke and one from the special education stream spoke. Daniel stole the show. He stood on the stage in his new suit and tie and spoke for a short two minutes about what his school meant to him and what he had learned. There wasn’t a dry eye in the auditorium. Those moments were some of the most wonderful moments in my entire life.

Remembering rocking him as an infant, not knowing what to expect and now he was making me so proud. Daniel is courageous, he is dashingly handsome and he exudes an incredibly warm personality.

My hope for his future is that he continues to keep everyone laughing at his wonderful sense of humour and continues to have the courage to work hard at everything he endeavors. He is truly a miracle.

www.dsao.ca

www.nads.org